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I never expected to feel so empty after my graduation from the Linnaeus University here in Växjö Sweden. After three years of knowing what to do, the reality hit me like baseball bat between the eyes. Too many options! The world before my feet. Strategically thinking I should get myself a job as business developer and kick start a career at a promising corporation. It would be awesome to work as a business developer in an organisation helping startups. I´m especially interested in investment analysis, social entrepreneurs and real estate. But I think I might be too picky when it comes to choosing employer. I´m having such a problem doing things I´m not interested in, things that don´t inspire and challenge me enough. I want to believe that the perfect job for me is out there somewhere. I actually applied for, what I believe, is the perfect job for me but unfortunately I was not accepted. It was a position as an investment manager at an non profit investment company investing in social entrepreneurs or social businesses doing good for the society. I have accepted the fact that I have a big need to feel that whatever I do must serve a good purpose for people, society or the world.

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But emotionally and due to my personality as a problem solver and challenge- and freedom junkie I can´t think of anything else but to make a reality of my many business ideas and fun projects. Though I´m always struggling with the balance between the fun and the money In my projects. It seems like I´m (just like Filip and Fredrik) is driven by lust and not so much by the money. I don´t really fancy money as it is but I do value my time and I think life is too short to do things you don´t love doing. And in the world we´re all living in, time is unfortunately money.

The last three years I´ve really come to terms with, and accepted, who I am and what I want from life. I do realize that I´m a lot different to the ”typical swede” and it feels alright, but sometimes I feel lonely being different. I´ve never considered myself different before but I know very few people not wanting to have kids, get married and live the ”Svensson life” or the american dream. I know how I don´t want to live my life and I do think I know how I´d like to live it, but I don´t know how to get there, I can´t really see the road leading to there. I want to find a context that suits me and where I fit in. I don´t want to stay but I don´t know where to go. I say as the Swedish comedians Galenskaparna use to say: ”Man letar å letar efter sin rätta plats, men livet är onumrerat och jag har ju inte ens biljett”.More about how I know I don´t want to live my life and how I want to live my life in a later blogpost.

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The last 8 weeks I´ve been thinking and thinking. Considered all the possibilities, all the opportunities. Frustrated like a five year old with ADD high on sugar I threw all the balls i had in the sky (I know this metaphor might not work in english but use your imagination) and waited for one or another to land and work out for me. I thought about investing in rental properties, buying a rental apartment, going to Los Angels for 3 months, move into an RV or a boat or move to New Zealand and work as a business developer etc etc. I´m sure I will do all of these things when the time is right. First things first and I need to invest my time and money wisely to be able to do what I love doing without having to get a traditional employment. For now I got a whole different plan. It´s so super exciting I almost pee myself. I´ll let you know tomorrow. Buenas noches amig@s!

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